Funny Jokes stories Free Funny Photos Pictures Images 2013

Funny Jokes stories Free Funny Photos Pictures Images 2013

Source:Google.com.pk

Biography:

* A man and his wife were working in their garden one day when the man looked over at his wife and said, "Your butt's getting huge. I bet it's bigger than the barbecue."
With that, he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measured the grill. Then he went over to where his wife was working and measured her butt.
"I was right, your butt is two inches wider than the barbecue!"
The woman chose to ignore her husband. Later that night in bed, the husband felt a little frisky. He made some advances toward her, but she completely brushed him off.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
She replied, "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill for one little weenie?"

* A guy hears a knocking on his door. He opens it up, and no one is there. He looks all around and he finally sees a little snail sitting on the doormat. He picks it up and throws it across the street into a field.
Ten years later, he hears a knocking on his door. He opens it up and no one is there. He looks all around, and he finally sees a little snail sitting on the doormat.
The snail says, ‘What the heck was that all about?’

* A cat dies and goes to Heaven. God meets him at the gate and says, ‘You’ve been a good cat all of these years. Anything you desire is yours, all you have to do is ask.’
The cats says, ‘Well, I lived all my life with a poor family on a farm and had to sleep on hardwood floors.’ God says, ‘Say no more.’ And instantly, a fluffy pillow appears. A few days later, 6 mice are killed in a tragic accident and they go to Heaven. God meets them at the gate with the same offer that He made the cat.
The mice said, ‘All our lives we’ve had to run. We’ve been chased by cats, dogs and even women with brooms. If we could only have a pair of roller skates, we wouldn’t have to run anymore.’ God says, ‘Say no more.’ And instantly, each mouse is fitted with a beautiful pair of tiny roller skates.
About a week later, God decides to check and see how the cat is doing. The cat is sound asleep on his new pillow. God gently wakes him and asks,
‘How are you doing? Are you happy here?’
The cat yawns and stretches and says, ‘Oh, I’ve never been happier in my life. And those Meals on Wheels you’ve been sending over are the best!

* A woman confided to her girlfriend, “My ex-husband wants to marry me again.”
The friend said, “How flattering.”
The woman replied, “Not really. I think he’s after the money I married him for.”

Funny Jokes stories Free Funny Photos Pictures Images 2013

Funny Jokes stories Free Funny Photos Pictures Images 2013

Funny Jokes stories Free Funny Photos Pictures Images 2013

Funny Jokes stories Free Funny Photos Pictures Images 2013

Funny Jokes stories Free Funny Photos Pictures Images 2013

Funny Jokes stories Free Funny Photos Pictures Images 2013

Funny Jokes stories Free Funny Photos Pictures Images 2013

Funny Jokes stories Free Funny Photos Pictures Images 2013

Funny Jokes stories Free Funny Photos Pictures Images 2013

Funny Jokes stories Free Funny Photos Pictures Images 2013

Funny Jokes stories Free Funny Photos Pictures Images 2013